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OshKosh
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| *GAY MARRIAGE* |
| 11.29.04 (9:16 pm) [edit] |
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Here is the gay marriage portion of my paper. Please speak your mind on either my writing or the subject. Or on anything i could have done better.
Gay marriage is constantly talked of and is constantly brought back to the Bible. “Marriage is ordained by God to be between a man and a woman (Genesis 2:21-24; Matthew 19:4-6)”(Gotquestions.org) However, not everyone reads and abides by the Bible. You can’t make laws based on the Bible’s teachings. All citizens have to abide by the law, and all citizens do not have to abide by the Bible. That’s the beauty of freedom of religion. “Allowing lesbians and gay men access only to domestic partnerships, while reserving marriage for different sex couples, is a form of second-class citizenship.”(Wolfson) Homophobia is as ridiculous and as stupid as racism. A person’s sexuality has nothing to do with their eligibility to citizen’s rights. History always repeats itself, and I fear separating homosexuals from rights such as marriage is no better then denying blacks the right to vote. “Discrimination - treatment or consideration based on class or category rather than individual merit; partiality or prejudice.” (dictionary.com) Denying homosexuals the right of marriage is not just tantamount to discrimination - it is discrimination.
Marriage is a right everyone should have, something as mere as a persons sexuality shouldn’t determine rights. Criminals break the law; thus, not receiving certain rights. How in any way is someone’s sexuality committing a crime?
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| Excuse me. |
| 11.28.04 (7:32 pm) [edit] |
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Okay. Excuse the birtney video on the right...I don't nomraly like pop...but this is how i feel about my life right now. So i guess it's poetry? k... kidding
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| Lead me not into temptation...I'll find my own way. |
| 11.28.04 (7:18 pm) [edit] |
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Oh, boy. Some guys just wont give up. For the past few days, I've been getting text messages and phone calls...basicly for a booty call. And by the ONE guy i'd love to do anything with regardless. Yes, Jared. Which sucks because I have a boyfriend...he knows it...and they were friends. Never the less, i look horrible even writing this stuff. Don't worry, I havn't taken advantage to any of his invites...only through strong resistance and threts of eileen making me a scarlett letter. but alkfjdoaufdaljfdlakf he's soooo hot. Last night, I invited him to this party we were at...and he ended up comming sometime later in the night when I had left to spend the night at dwights. agh! I HATE IT HE'S SO HOT AND I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM EVER BECAUSE I LOVE DWIGHT BUT JARED IS SO HOT AND IT'S NOT THAT BAD BECAUSE I WANTED JARED BEFORE I MET DWIGHT....SO BASICLY...JARED IS UNFINISHED BUSINESS...YES THAT IS RIGHT!
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| ABORTION |
| 11.28.04 (7:06 pm) [edit] |
Here is a portion of my paper...the abortion section. Give me all sorts of comments...good and bad...i want it all.
Abortion is a controversial subject that will never have a “right” or “wrong” answer. Abortion is the act of removing a fetus from a woman; and some may label abortion as murder. “The church clearly teaches common sense, at least commonly understands: abortion is wrong because it kills a human being.”(Pavone) Regularly, the Catholic Church opposes abortion due to the fact that they believe human life starts as soon as a human is conceived. Therefore, abortion is murder, and murder is illegal. Why are Catholics pushing to illegalize abortion, when other religions believe a human isn’t “human” until it’s born?
& nbsp; &n bsp; &nb sp;
“Judaism holds that it [life] begins at birth and abortion is not murder”(wcla.com). If a Jewish woman wanted to get an abortion (if they were illegal), it could be easily interpreted as oppressive, and goes against freedom of religion. If Catholics keep pushing for illegal abortions due to their beliefs, we might as well say they have to stop serving wine to miners during communion.
& nbsp; &n bsp; &nb sp; I believe pro-choice, and that a woman should have the ability to choose her fate and whether or not to have children. Now days, with all the technology and birth control options out there, it’s easy to be protected against pregnancy. There is birth control, condoms, sterilization, and other sources. Not all people who get pregnant are unprotected and irresponsible. “She had her fun, now let her pay for it. If you have sex, you should expect to get pregnant and pay the consequences.” (wcla.com) “This vindictive, self-righteous attitude stems from a belief that sex is bad and must be punished. Motherhood should never be punishment for having sex. Forcing a child to be born to punish its mother is the ultimate in child abuse.”(wcla.com) A woman does have the right to abort a child, whatever the circumstance. If abortion is illegal, that doesn’t mean people won’t do it at all. Prostitution is illegal, and it’s the oldest on-going profession in the world; making it illegal makes it less safe for every party involved. For years women would go to butchers for abortions, do it themselves with wire hangers and knitting needles, only resulting in seriously injuring or even killing them. In desperate situations, people will do anything. Presently, abortion is safe and very low risk.
"Overall, abortion is safer than carrying a pregnancy to term and going through childbirth." (Planned Parenthood) “Birth control is a controversial political and ethical issue in many countries and religions.” (wikipedia.org) Some conservatives oppose birth control. Abortion and birth control go hand in hand to them. Birth control is a form to deny a baby from ever happening, and to them it’s just as bad as abortion.
“For a year, Julee Lacey stopped in a CVS pharmacy near her home in aFort Worth suburb to get refills of her birth-control pills. Then one day last March, the pharmacist refused to fill Lacey's prescription because she did not believe in birth control. ‘I was shocked,’ says Lacey, 33, who was not able to get her prescription until the next day and missed taking one of her pills. ‘Their job is not to regulate what people take or do. It's just to fill the prescription that was ordered by my physician.’‘I refuse to dispense a drug with a significant mechanism to stop human life,’ says Karen Brauer, was fired in 1996 after she refused to refill a prescription for birth-control pills at a Kmart in the Cincinnati suburb of Delhi Township.” (www.talkabouttravelling.com) If you don’t believe that birth control is right, then don’t use it. Denying someone’s privilege to receive medication prescribed by a doctor is not your job or your business.
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| A venting piece of shit |
| 10.17.04 (4:00 am) [edit] |
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So, everything is so different then i expected it to be this year. Some of my friends are pissing me off SO bad. Vanessa causes a lot of drama, because she's trying to impress everyone. When in reality she looks stupid, and we all laugh behind her back. Then she goes and says that IM the one causing drama...and i have no reason to. Ally and i have been talking a lot, and so have i and kim. Well vanessa stated to katelyn "If Ally and Ally become friends again...she's out". OUT OF FUCKING WHAT? vanessa's so-called self made group? RAH! So yeah in person to me she like doesn't talk, but talks so much shit about me. I am not a conseaded person, but i know the reason she's being hasty is because she's jealous for stupid numerous reasons. So friday she like came and sat by us...and like didnt talk...so im like "So vanessa....for not talking much you sure have a lot of shit to say". And she acted as if nothing was wrong...and i proceded to call her a pussy, and i told her if she talks shit about me i garrentee it will get back to me. then she did what she was best at... sat there and did nothing.
God I'm confusing my self so much. Every time luc and i talk on the phone it's just natural to be my self and he accepts it...and always has. We talk all the time, and yeah..stupid stuff has happend. Luc is still in love with his EX, and i'm always there to help when he needs to talk about it. Thats why we became friends a long time ago...he needed a female oppinion...and i was convenietly online...and we've been bestfriends since. i cant help but wonder if i'm in love with him. Over the summer i always found my self sad about him, because we wern't talking. I dont know. his friends tease him...because they dont have any relationships with girls besides sexual ones...and luc and i (well almost) have been just friends for some time. SO i get 3 AM drunkin phone calls from luc's phone...with his friends pretending to be luc...saying "Ally we should have sex" and stupid things. to me, prank calls should have stopped in middle school...and 19 year old guys should figure that out. I wonder if luc's ever said anything to them about me...i dunno.
I love dwight so much. But he's pissing me off really bad. It's our senior year, but that doesnt mean he needs to be an ass hole to me. Like he'll be like "IM going to the volleyball game"...not like i go to the same school as him or anything...it wouldnt hurt to invite me to go with him. I've also resently relized...i get along with all the guys...but NONE of the girls. seriously...i have a problem with most girls in my grade....for some reason. It's either they're stupid, and i think they're worthless...or they like/liked dwight...and i make it known to them that he's TAKEN...so they dont like me. I could care less though. I dont expect to fit in with everyone...that would be stupid to do. I just wish i wasn't such an outspoken bitch somtimes...i guess i cant help it.
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| "Thing a ma bob" |
| 09.20.04 (8:56 pm) [edit] |
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Name]: ally [Spell your name backwards]:yllA [Birthdate]: april 22
[Birthplace]: st. mary's hospital...i think? [Current Location]: Spokane [Occupation(s)]: SENIOR!
[Eye Color]: brown [Hair Color]: Brown w/ highlights [Righty or Lefty]: right [Zodiac Sign]: Taurus...like my car. [Innie or Outtie]: innie [Describe yourself in 4 words]: Crazy, dramatic, deep and HORNY...just kidding about the last one.
[Who is your worst enemy?]: stupid bitches that want my boyfriend! *SLAP* [If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be?]: "a liger...bread for it's skills in magic" [What is the latest you've ever stayed up]: all night [Ever been to Belgium?]: no...but i hear good things..or somthing
[What's your favorite coin?]: Hum...never thought about it...probably a penny...for its unique color and material...and the tini lincon on the back...you can never get sick of looking at that!
DESCRIBE YOUR- [Wallet]: Lime green with a pineapple on it
[Jewelery worn daily]: Class ring, spoon ring, irish rings...and dimond stud earings and a neckalce [Sunglasses]: my pink or red ones [Favorite shirt]: anything confertable
[Favorite pants]: jeans [Favorite shoes]: i have lots of favorites [Cologne/Perfume]: as of right now, bath and bodyworks cotton blossom
[CD in stereo right now]: Beatles
[Tattoos]: not yet [Piercings]: e ars, and belly button [Makeup]:of course
[Do you like candles]:yes..pumpkin smelling ones..reminds me of fall [Do you like hot wax]:sure? [Do you like incense]: Im more into candles [Fetishes]: nice: Necks, jawbones, hip bones, eye brows and anckles...expecialy when their bony with anckle socks...hold me back. (all of the above turn me for some reason.) [Do you like sex]: Okay...why is this even on here? YES! I LOVE SEX! AND MY BOYFRIEND NEEDS TO STOP BEING SUCH A GIRL BECAUSE ITS MAKING ME MAD!
[Do you believe in love]: yes [Do you believe in soulmates]: to an extent [Do you believe in love at first sight]: to an extent [Do you believe in forgiveness]: yes
[Your fears]: the dark, being alone [One thing you'd like to achieve]: Following my heart.
[Most overused phrase on aim]:"how fun!" [The first feature you notice in the opposite sex]: if they have nice a nice neck, jawbone, ass and teeth. [Your best physical feature]: teath [Cuss]: Yes yes. [Sing well]: SO i've heard [Want to go to college]:yes [Like high school]: yes
[Been on stage]: yes! and it kicks [Been called a tease]:Yes yes yes
[Best eye color]:Brown...with big eye lashes [Number of guys ive kissed]: 4...i wish it was more! [four beverages you drink frequently] 1. Water 2.Smirnoff
3.bacardi 4. coffee
[five tv shows you liked when you were a little kid] 1. saved by the bell 2. pokadot door
3. all that
4. are you afraid of the dark 5. Power rangers *IM THE PINK ONE*
[four places to go in your area] 1. Dwights
2.The Falls (college parties)
3.Friends houses
4.mall
[four things to do when you're bored] 1.Eat 2.sleep 3.Drink 4.Shop
[four things that never fail to cheer you up] 1. Talking to Luc
2. writing
3. Hanging out with friends 4. watching oldschool/zoolander/naple an dynomite
[six things you dislike] 1. stupid bitches who like my boyfriend!
2. stupid people who think theyre hot 3. Ass holes named teddy 4. fast food people who get ur orders wrong
5. people who brag about being "Bad" 6. MR BROWN!
[seven things on your desk]
1. traper keeper..fuck yeah 2. popcorn
3. lint roller 4. ribbon
5. speakers
6. cell phone 7. pictures
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| "So long sweet summer".. |
| 09.19.04 (5:56 pm) [edit] |
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It's official..summer is over. Sigh for disapointment and relief. this is whats been going on latly:
Grease-Tryed out and honestly should have had a part....but mr. brown can suck his husbands cock... yeah that was some MORE aditude for you, brown.
Friends-Are good. It's weird, Kim trys to talk to me all the time now. Kim and Ally seem miserable...parting is getting old to them...too bad they ditched all their friends to do so. muahaha. I know i party a lot...but I don't make it my life like they do.
Boys-Dwighty and i are good. He finally had sex with me last night (haha eileen)...this time my attempt didn't result in a black eye and 26 stiches. Teddy can die...he's a fucker and i dunno why i even liked him. Things with luc are so good...we'll we still arn't as close as we used to be...but we're getting there. Im happy. There is this extreamly hot guy in my drama class named Joseph...i pretty much wanna hit that BAD...but! I have self controle!
School- So easy. and really fun.
Work-Im getting a job at a daycare...im excited. I told my parents that im going to no matter what...they piss me off bad. i fuckin need somthing to do...ya know?
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| true/false |
| 08.17.04 (11:39 pm) [edit] |
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This is something that's true This is something that's false 1. I have issues with the subject of commitment 2. I'm a girl 03. I hate makeup 04. I prefer music over books 05. I used to play an instrument 06. I have dark brown eyes 07. I am on AIM entirely too much. 08. I think everyone is a pyscho 09. I wanna do something in the medical business 10. I can't lick my elbow (and have tried) 11. Stars are awesome 12. I dont wear contacts (even though im supposed to) 13. I do not know my natural hair color 14. I really have no life 15. I am cooler than you 16. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year 17. There is a really cool looking dog with a bone in it's mouth on my keyboard 18. I have a lot to learn 19. I have a dog 20. I bet I won't move very far away 21. I've broken a bone 22. I have secrets 23. I hate snow 24. I have cried during a movie 25. Subway cookies rock 26. I do not have glasses on right now 27. I eat too much 28. I just ate yogurt 29. I am far more ordinary than you might think 30. I like abc family 31. I didn't even know there was a girl in my class name Patricia 32. I don't always need what I think I need 33. I have asthma 34. Tom Delonge is one hot boy 35. I'm currently watching 7th heaven 36. I cried all the time when I was little 37. I am alive 38. Lollie pops are the shiz 39. I haven't used a regular pencil for a long time 40. I like comedy movies 41. Koosh balls are awesome 42. I don't have online buddies 43. My hands are always warm 44. I like Taking Back Sunday 45. I'm not a panda 46. I'm not very patriotic 47. I'd like to fluently speak another language 48. I spend too much time on the computer 49. I have too much crap on my desk 51. My friends are one of the most important people in my life 52. I'd like to be more original 53. I've lied 54. I don't like Xanga's that disable right-clicking 55. I'm a reasonable person 56. I wonder what happens when you die 57. I should hang up my one picture 58. I could use a good hug 59. I can not WAIT until I love the 90s on vh1 60. I am wearing shorts 61. I'm broke! 62. I'm a little selfish at times 63. I hate going to class 64. Christmas is fun 65. I'm 5'2"or so 66. I sometimes tend to be very antisocial 67. I don't have contacts 68. I watch tv or listen to music before I go to sleep 69. Blue is an awesome color 70. So is green 71. I hate pink 72. I'm not so innocent 73. I want to be somewhere else right now 74. Cherry coke rocks! 75. I don't like bugs (imagine that.. a girl who doesn't like bugs...) 76. I have a pink mouse pad 77. I like people who are funny 78. I've been talking too much 79. Mmm, Pringles 80. I have my music on too loud. 81. I am going food shopping with my mom today 82. I can't wait for summer 83. You make me so nervous 84. I wish I could travel more 85. I have never seen a harry potter movie 86. I need to practice not being so shy 87. My belly button itches 88. I have a lot of scars because i am very accident prone and I tripped a lot as a kid 89. i like carosels 90. I'm generally happy. 91. I like to find good music 92. I miss being a kid 93. I like cheese 94. I have more than one best friend 95. I am very lazy 96. I'm trying to think of facts right now. 97. I hate thunder. 98. I laugh at things people don't think are funny 99. I need to go to more concerts 100. I'm in denial at the moment
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| Numb |
| 08.15.04 (6:07 pm) [edit] |
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*Numb* While i sit here, this ciggirett tastes dull. I'm numbed. Wondering why, from foreign chemicals flowing insted of blood, or just confusion of who i am. What do i want? To stop crying all these nights. Making my innosent years my most depressed disease. Nothing is to blame, this is who a I am. So please grasp and sease.
~So i wrote that just a minute ago...why am i so depressed? I am making a major issues out of mere growing up mishaps. I think I'm fucking my self over.
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| Numb |
| 08.15.04 (6:06 pm) [edit] |
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*Numb* While i sit here, this ciggirett tastes dull. I'm numbed. Wondering why, from foreign chemicals flowing insted of blood, or just confusion of who i am. What do i want? To stop crying all these nights. Making my innosent years my most depressed disease. Nothing is to blame, this is who a I am. So please grasp and sease.
~So i wrote that just a minute ago...why am i so depressed? I am making major issues out of mere growing up mishaps. I think I'm fucking my self over.
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| boys suck |
| 08.12.04 (1:00 pm) [edit] |
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Damit, i feel like a stupid little girl when i say this but: Boys suck. You'd think that a 21 year old would be just as; or more mature then a 17 year old...but no.
Teddy is stupid. I find my self liking him more and more...it's honestly pathedic. He has a girlfriend, but he said he'd break up with her to get to know me better. Okay...what an ass...he doesn't know too much about me, but based on my face he'd break up with his girlfriend for me. He also is lying to me about everything, he said he doesn't have a girlfriend... when he and I both know thats not true, then i said marty told me he has a girlfriend, then teddy is dumbfounded. When teddy says the word "Working" Thats probably code for "hanging out with my ugly girlfriend". I hate him...and i need to just STOP.
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| So much. |
| 08.09.04 (11:55 pm) [edit] |
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Well, i havn't blogged in a while... there has been a couple events that have happend in the period of non-blogging:
Nini- My friend from 6th grade came up to viset me. that was cool, and i found my self getting annoyed constantly with her. But now that she's gone...i really miss her..because she was here for 5 days..and i constantly was busy with her...no im like...what do i do?
Dwight-Dwight was out of town..now hes back...now im confused. We had a long talk today..he told me he often thinks about breaking up with me..and perhaps he'd be happyer with out me...yeah...sad...but i think the same things....who knows...everything happends for a reason.
Teddy- Teddy is a college boy i'v e known all summer...and he has a newfound intrest in me. And i've always thought he was hot; but now I think i like him. The night we started to like eachother...we cuddled and went to sleep together..and i found it merly cuddling...he took it as more. now...he really likes me...and we've been hanging out like everyday. He keeps asking me "So what if i was to kiss you?" (Knowing perfictly well that i have a boyfriend...and that he has a girlfriend also...thats his age) And i reply to his question "I'd say no". But he says "Would you be able to look me in the eyes and say you wouldnt kiss me?" and i say "yes, i bet you". and he says "what would you bet?" and i said "If i cant say it...ill kiss you; but if i tell you i can't kiss you...you have to leave us at that". Of course being a cocky college boy...he agreed thinking he will win. He still hasn't gotten a kiss. So my friend Vanessa is dating Teddy's bestfriend...and he told him that he would break up with his girlfriend for me...and he like's me a lot.... Right.
Jared-basicly i'd have sex with him and cuddle with him and not have a relationship. I've been hanging out with jared a lot latly...to my suprise. Hey, i get free carwashes..and get to flirt with one of the hottest guys in my school.
Luc- Serioulsy, a couple nights ago...this had to be fate. So nini and i are following vanessa and katlyn to a party, and they randomly stop at wendys. So nini and i are waiting...and then nini desides she wants fries. So we start going to the drive though...and when vanessa and kaityln go though it there was like no one..but there was 6 cars in line. so nini's like "Yeah i dont want to wait that long for damn fries...lets go in" and i say "I dont want to go in, ill wait" so i pull up in frount of wendys and deside "Why not...i'll go in". So we walk in, i see Lewis turner (a kid i know) and i say hello, and then notice Luc, jared and someother guys are with them. Of course i flirt with jared..then relize that luc is there too...and of course jared like "Luc! ally misses you...talk to her"...and awkward. I became extreamly sad that night because luc was like "Hey..." not anything more. Only replying to my questions with one word responces. I dont quite blame him since i left him like 6 drunken messages..some crying and confessing my love for him...but we wont talk about that.
Yes... so the month of august so far as been freaking me out. So much has changed...and givin me new reasons to think of what im doing with my life...and that is... I'm a unloyal person to the one person who truly loves me and cares for me then anyone else...while I basicly have other relationships along the side. Someone needs to slap me. I desurve it.
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| Condoms suck. |
| 07.29.04 (11:51 pm) [edit] |
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Condoms suck. The only time you should use them is if you're already on birthcontrole. Just using condoms isn't good enough....believe me. I had a BAD night.... :cry:
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| "Doh, a deer" |
| 07.28.04 (11:22 pm) [edit] |
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So, i pretty much hate fucking deer. I was at this party with friends, and we wanted Baccartie insted of beer, although i am perfetly connent with drinking beer...Imma beer girl, which is rare. So i've already had a little to drink, so jenaye says she'd drive my car, and rob comes along since he's 21 (to buy) (and fucking hot....even thought that doesn't matter....yes very hot...)(Did i say hot?) So we're driving and talking....and RANDOMLY there is this dead deer in the middle of our lane...and somone is along side of us....so yes. we RAN over the fucking deer...not only that...but it sidded across the bottom of my car. So after a few minutes...it starts to REEK...and we figure its the dead deer on my car. So we get to albertsons...and rob wants to make sure its not my oil or somthing...so he sticks his hand under my car to check....and he touchted dead deer residue! EW...to make a long story short....I won't eat meat...ever...that is how bad the smell was. I had to get my fucking car detailed inside and out. There were deer chuncks under my fucking hood....how the fuck is that possible? Anyways...if you see a deer...shoot it for me...those fucking deer deside to die in the middle of the highway....they should know better! FUCKING DEER
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| So Yesterday. |
| 07.28.04 (11:14 pm) [edit] |
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So. The other night, i got extreamly drunk....like the drunkest i've ever been. About half of the night i was just crying. I feel so alone. I don't have my two bestfriends...ally and luc. I'm glad Ally and i are not friends, but at the same time, my life was so much easyer...I never had to feel this way before. I cryed mostly about luc though. For the past month, i've bottled feelings inside, and slighty opening up to mention I missed him. That night...i let out a lot of what i needed to. When you get really really drunk, you explode all hidden feelings. I let out that i've had eating disorders, jealousy, chris, Luc (of course) and ally. I think i should get drunk every night now....perhaps i'll get over him one i've exploded all my feelings...once things get un bottled....i'll have nothing left to say. GOOD IDEA ALLY :?
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| two years ago. |
| 07.26.04 (10:52 am) [edit] |
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Two years ago from yesterday, is spent the night at Chris's...and i fell for him that night. This morning 2 years ago, i woke up laying next to him, as his blues bored at me. Can a look wake you up? Well two years ago this morning it did. I think i've found someone who can even beat out my worst heart break: Luc. Latly, chris is meaning nothing, and im not caring anymore. God, why am i so vonerable?
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| A to Z |
| 07.14.04 (12:38 am) [edit] |
A is for age: 17 B is for boyfriend: yes C is for career: Uh... saturday im working for my aunt barbra...? An an asistant for hair dressers on saturday...a mini job? God i suck. D is for dad's name: Allan..or a fucker named Grant. E is for essential item to bring to a party: extra beer...just in case. F is for favorite song at the moment: G is for good movie you recently saw: Anchorman...it was so so H is for hometown: K either Spokane or detroit...which would you choose? I is for instruments you play: Dwighty..... J is for jewel that you like: Dimond K is for kids: Yes, their names will be Charolette, Gracie, Royal, and aden. L is for living arrangements: At my house...but im in detroit bumming houses at my cousins, grandpas and aunts. M is for mom's name: Nancy N is for the number of people you've slept with: 1 O is for overnight hospital stays: zero P is for phobia(s): Ghosts Q is for quote you like: "So Kiss me hard, cause this will be the last time that I'll let you" R is for right, what's on your right?: a guitar S is for sexual position: Spooning T is for time you wake up: when everyone is getting ready for dinner and they awaken me...fuckers. U is for unique trait(s): I can bend my elbos the other way...weird visual. V is for vegetable you love: bracalie..sp? uh... W is for worst habit: A.D.D....is that a habbit? I dunno...i cant tell stories..because ill be like" and then this one time....wow...pringles are so good!" Or like this one time.... X is for x-rays you've had: my teath? Y is for yummy food you make: toast...thats making food right? Z is for zodiac sign:Taurus
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| Detroit rock city. |
| 07.12.04 (6:09 pm) [edit] |
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So, i am in michigan. Detroit...the suposed arm pit of america. You know, they have these names for a reason. I grew up here, and it feels as though i've never left, but i at the same time, im used to being a little kid and playing with my cousins and when famiy used to be cool to hang around. Im not friends with any of my old friends from here, so i have family left to hang out with. I have no problem what so ever with that, since i get along really well with the cousins i hang out with, but its harder as you get older, because you cannot expect to have all your time spent with you're cousins, because they have lifes of their own. Sooooooooo it sucks. My mom and i got in a fight about it today. I've realized that i have become bitter over the years about comming here. I have to deal with the family drama, and you're not able to ecape once you are in the presents of it all. I used to think of detroit as limbo. Spokane was my hell, and L.O. was my heaven. Detroit was different, it wasn't horrible and it wasnt wonderful...i could just think...it was calming. But i knew that i'd end up in my hell, and i'd be even farther away from LO. Now LO is a distant memory, and detroit has become my hell and spokane, my heaven. I need another limbo...it was nice to be away from everything.
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| Detroit rock city. |
| 07.12.04 (6:08 pm) [edit] |
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So, i am in michigan. Detroit...the suposed arm pit of america. You know, they have these names for a reason. I grew up here, and it feels as though i've never left, but i at the same time, im used to being a little kid and playing with my cousins and when famiy used to be cool to hang around. Im not friends with any of my old friends from here, so i have family left to hang out with. I have no problem what so ever with that, since i get along really well with the cousins i hang out with, but its harder as you get older, because you cannot expect to have all your time spent with you're cousins, because they have lifes of their own. Sooooooooo it sucks. My mom and i got in a fight about it today. I've realized that i have become bitter over the years about comming here. I have to deal with the family drama, and you're not able to ecape once you are in the presents of it all. I used to think of detroit as limbo. Spokane was my hell, and L.O. was my heaven. Detroit was different, it wasn't horrible and it wasnt wonderful...i could just think...it was calming. But i knew that i'd end up in my hell, and i'd be even farther away from LO. Now LO is a distant memory, and detroit has become my hell and spokane, my heaven. I need another limbo...it was nice to be away from everything.
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| Sex and the (little) city. |
| 07.01.04 (12:22 pm) [edit] |
K, why are new york men so hot? I've been talking to this one guy from new york...so fucking hot. Italin...dj...ah so hot. HOw i know him?here we go:
So what happend is i was friends with this one girl, and she is seriously over ugly, and over weight. And she'd talk about her boyfriend "Taylor" who lives in texas, but used to live here. I saw pictures and he's hot, and blond. he'd send me emials from him and stuff, so i decided that i'd talk to her "Boyfriend" and see if he's real, because, frankly she's ugly, and it wasn't to believable. So i found out his name is Anthony and he lives in new york, and didn't look ANYTHING like what she said he looked like. He's tall, dark, omg sooo hot.He was telling me how megan says she's "Homecomming queen and a cheerleader" and im like uh...and he's like "Can i send you her picture, and tell me if that's really her?" and im like "Sure." Yeah, so i open the email, and to my supirise...the pictures were of me. So yeah, I'm pretty much not friends with her anymore. But...hes so hot. I've been talking to him everyday. There are no guys like that here...he lives in new york city...and god his accent....oh so hot. I'd do him. :lol:
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| I want to do him. |
| 06.30.04 (12:38 am) [edit] |
Is it bad that i want to do my boyfriends' bestfriend?
He's one of my best guy friends and we have similar last names, so we've sat next to eachother in every class since highschool. I've always found him attractive...but latly... i dont know. I just want to do him. It all started when he said "Dwight, ally looks hot today" and then was walking around with his shirt off. Yes, i want to do him. bad......ajdsl;fj :twisted:
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| "Damn right, it's better then yours" |
| 06.26.04 (11:46 pm) [edit] |
Hupf. You know what sucks like almost more then dying? Seeing someone you were once with, with a NEW girlfriend. God. it's very irrotating. So this guy, named Kris, (i have had lots of boys named chris's, kris's, and christopher's in my life...i dont recomend chris's.) and i would hang out a lot, and my boyfriend and i were having hard times, and we broke up. SO kris and i would hang out a ton, but dwight and i were still going though troubles and drama. So Kris really liked me and i thought he was kick. So yeah to make a short story short, he stopped calling and talking to me...because he didn't want to be involved in my boyfriends and my drama. K understandable...but what a pussy. (roar still mad bout that one) So he ditched me for this one UGLY girl (im not just saying that) because she didn't have a boyfriend. thats pathedic. His friends would give him shit for ditching me. god. I almost left EVERYTHING with dwight in the gutter. Perhaps it was a good idea that kris is an ass. ANYWAYS i saw him today, with his girlfriend. he looked so fucking hot....and you know when guys grow out of the boyish stage...and they're like BAM way the fuck hot...yes that is what happend to him. He's hot. Fuck. Sam jenaye and josh said that i was cuter then his girlfriend so..."damn right it's better then yours". I didn't even see her...i saw him, and a hand in his and then i talked to sam about chest hair. Fuck.
OH! her fucking name is Ally too! GOD! what the fuckkkkk. I need to get over the past...like now. alkdfjlakjf;akjf;alkfju[o aiudf;lkaj;lauofiua;dlkja ;lkfujdlakfj*fuck*
I have said fuck a lot today.
Fuck.
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| RIP |
| 06.25.04 (12:41 am) [edit] |
"RIP" Wonds seep black, at first. Then supsides to the velvet red of bloods nature. Fresh streems drip down my chest, over the old dry stains. Then drys, and drips again. The cavity inwhich osses my energy was caused by your power; your power over my heart. Tears and tears streamed down as the blood does now. I clenched my hands tight to the sheets, clenched for pain, of the sound of you ripping my heart out. No longer is my heart able in my body. I can only bleed and never heal from the wonds you caused me.
I think chris is my only insperation for writing. That's pathedic. One night with one boy two years ago has had an unusual impact on me. I can write about my grandma and falling out of love with dwight...but not like all the time. If i wanted to just randomly write...it will end up being about chris. Everything i write has to do with him. in Creative writing i wrote a symbolic story about a little kid finding out there is no santa, and its metaphorical of heartbreak...and well my situation. I need to move on. Dwight isn't getting chris off my mind anymore. Dwight...oh god. I love that boy...but i am not inlove with him anymore. Sometimes i feel as though i am. But...i dunno. I need to...shut up. :roll:
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| "I guess thats why they call it the blues" |
| 06.24.04 (10:58 pm) [edit] |
So, do you ever have weird ideas at two in the morning, and at the time, they seem no big deal, but the next morning you're like [b]"what the shit?" [/b]Yes, i had one of those nights.
So, my sister is moving out, and all her shit was out. She likes to experiance with different funky hair colors such as: Purple blue and red. So, im looking though her shit, and im like [b]"HUm, i wonder what i'd look like with a few tini blue streaks?" [/b]So i get the bottle out, and i pick out a few little chunks and foil them. ( I highlight my friends hair all the time, so that's not the problem). So they're done, i take them out, and they look fine....untill i shampooed (woah...how the shit do you spell that?)
SO, i shampood(Sp?). The thing with semi-perminet hair color is once it hits anysort of bleached hair, it grabs on and stays since the cutical is already open and the dye can penitrate deep into the hair shaft and it wont come out, ever (Without a color correction). i shampooed (Fuck i hate that word now), and when it latherd it grabbed one to all my bleached hair. Yes, this knowlage would have been fucking usefull at the time since i have (or had) highlights all over my head. So, i had fucking blue hair. We were going to silverwood the next day, and i actually went to silverwood with fucking blue hair. Fuck! SO yes, this morning i spent 4 hours and $100 to get out the blue. OH! and parts of my hair are so broken due to all the [b]chemical treatment.[/b] Yes....lets just not talk about this anymore.
"I guess thats why they call it the [b]blues[/b]" is now my theme song.
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| drugs are bad! |
| 06.20.04 (9:26 am) [edit] |
I learned an important lesson last night: If you've smoked weed before, and you didn't like it then, you wont like it now. So now i feel like an ass hole. I promised my mom and dwight that i would never smoke weed again. I was drunk, and i know that that is no excuse but if i was sober, i would have been smarter. So, i've already told dwight, now i just have to tell my mom. God i suck. I havn't smoked weed in like more then two years, and i took four hits, one out of a pipe and 3 out of a bong. I did all this at like maybe 2 am last night...and it's 10 am, and i'm still high, so bare with me. Mixing alchohal with weed...no good! I threw up 4 times like...hard. I havn't thrown up that much before, or ever whitnessed that much puke. I started crying 3 times: because kaitlyn and karissa went to walgreens, and cryed until they came back i guess. I cryed because i thought i was going to get in trouble,and i missed luc. So some of some of my thoughts last night:
1. I thought i was smarter then everyone else. I thought that i was doing a documentary on why not to do drugs. And i was a phycologiest and i was also the high person, and i felt skitzo.
2.You know when you were little, and you had one of those fake microphones that like vibrates inside and echos so it sounds loud? Yeah, i basicly felt like one of those for a while.
3.I changed into arials pj's, and i put the shirt on backwards. So i was falling asleep, and i felt the tag on my throut, and i freaked out and thought it was a spider.
4. If you ever want to know how it's like to feel crazy, then this is the best way to do it. (Thought i don't see why anyone would want to know how that feels) I honestly felt like a crazy, disabled person.
5. I always feel like i am in compleat controle of my actions, and i could handle any situation. But after 10 mintues of smoking weed, i was freaking out. Like i didn't want to go anywhere with out kaitlyn. And i was holding her hand. There was this black guy that was scaring me. He kept hitting on me, and was like "Wheres your man?" And im like "Oh dwighty! He's sleeping" and he's like "Damn, he let you out?" and im like "yes! he trusts me".( and then i smoke weed after i said he trusts me! fuck.) and he's like "You know, if you didn't have a man, i'd be.." and im like "No! I do have a boy though, stop sir!" but yeah, i didn't feel safe with that guy there, so i was like "Kaitlyn, please dont loose me". so we were holding hands, and black guys called us lesbians. and kaitlyn said "No, we're just good friends" haahaa
6. I puked do the mix of beer and pot. Honestly, it hurt to puke. Like i just kept puking! like i wouldnt stop! and kaitlyn and karissa like held my hair, and after a while they were like "So...lets not do this ever again!" haha...i'm their anti-drug hahahahahaha
7. I thought i was talking smart, but i wasn't. This morning i was telling parker that if he finds my wallet, he should refund me. what?
In short, don't smoke the pot. You'll end up pathedic like me.
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Video code provided by KEKAI BOY
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